Archive for June, 2011

Society’s Vigilante

June 20, 2011

As we can see here- you don’t need a big stick to stop evil doers.

There is always a chronic amount of ungraciousness embedded in Singapore’s population. I’m sure you’ve seen evidence of it; people not giving up their seats on the train to the special needs, litterbugs with selective eyesight that can’t spot the dustbin three metres away and so forth.

Fortunately, society has its ways of fighting back. The public, armed with their mobile phones with cameras, enjoy taking pictures of these culprits red-handed and then posting those incriminating photographs online in a bid to show and shame them.

Needless to say, there will then be an ensuing firestorm on the Internet with some condemning the person in the picture and lamenting about how our society is going downhill while others would tell the photographer to mind his or her own bloody business.

Sooner or later everyone would move on to the next piece of exciting news and forget about that incident. In a week or two, another similar picture would appear on the net and the whole cycle of outrage repeats itself.

Now at this point, any intelligent person would come to a similar conclusion as me; this way of combating social menace isn’t really working out too well.

Lucky for us, I have an idea. And if implemented I am pretty sure will solve these types of behavior once and for all.

All we would need is a piece of legislation that grants immunity to anyone who does anything to anyone or anyone’s property that is being a dick to society.

With this law in place, you are not just the average citizen anymore. You are society’s vigilante, much like Superman or Batman, just without the red underwear or cool gear.

The next time you see someone asleep on the reserved seating on the trains, feel free to take a sneeze in front of them or flick a nose booger in his or her direction. How about that neighbor who keeps parking in the handicap lot? Well you could always introduce your baseball bat to his Ferrari!

Most importantly for me; in case someone insists on standing on (and therefore blocking) the right side of the escalator at the train station which resulted in you missing your train. That is the time you pull out that frying pan of yours and give him or her a onetime good one to the back of their heads.

It might sound a little extreme, but it sure beats having to wait 6 minutes for the next train.

At this point most of you would be dismissing my suggestion as the usual bullcrap I spew, but I genuinely feel that this is the only effective way to rid society of these people. Selfishness, feigned ignorance, jerks and stupidity in general must always be combated with absurdity.

Think about it carefully. Everyone would be too terrified of everyone else to even cut a queue. You know you would be.


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Pyramid Scheme

June 14, 2011

As we can see here- the higher up we go, the fuller of themselves people tend to get.

I have tried countless times to write on this topic. And coincidentally, I have failed an equal number of times. Maybe it is due to the very personally offensive nature of it; but I’ll finish it this time, that I assure you.

I was once in an organization, not by choice mind you, whose sole purpose seemed to me to be the containment of anyone who would be a menace to society.

Many of them, barring a few hidden gems, like the high (oh look, a pun!) they get from their positions and enjoys their self-inflated ego. The evidence lies in the fact that when the higher you climb up the organization chart, the more likely the people there would refuse to listen to you and the less likely they would be in touch with the sentiments on the ground.

I may not know a lot about leadership but “making my men shiver”, as how one of them reminisced his days, is an insult to that word.

Maybe all large organizations are just pyramid schemes of varying degrees of severity. But I doubt there would be one any worse than the one I had been to with those supposed role models.

When I was little, I always respected adults. I thought all of them, except a very few bad apples, were good people. Mature, honest, wise, responsible, upright…the very pillars of society.

Not anymore.

But after all that anger, I started to let go of any ill-feelings I have had of them. You know why?

It was because I started to feel sorry for them.

I felt sorry that they were already more than halfway into their graves and they had only accomplished so little in their lives.

I feel sorry that, at this age, they were reduced to bootlicking, demeaning your juniors or fishing for some sort of superficial respect from them.

But most of all, I felt sorry for them that when their time on Earth is up; they could never look me in the eye and tell me they are proud of what they have done, that they have genuinely made society a better place for the rest of us.

Some lessons you learn willingly, while some other lessons are forced down your throat. But whatever it is, I know what lesson my colleagues and I learnt during our stay there-

It was one of the quieter days as my friend and I sat on the tarmac, watching the planes fly by.

“You know, when you grow up and happen to land a managerial role, would you be a jerk like the rest of them? Because I know I could not bear to bring myself to do such a thing” I asked.

“Never” said my friend.


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